oh my God what if I
miss my flight
I get into the car and we start driving and soon, too soon,
her car begins to slow down and I start thinking “oh my God what if I miss my
flight” and then we’re on the side of the road and a nice lady stops in her
truck and with her Jesus earrings and cross necklace and offers us a ride to
the airport and I say okay but Andrea can’t come with me but so we go our
separate ways and the nice lady is speeding past cops and somehow we don’t get
pulled over and I just keep praying that our luck will hold and now I have a
half an hour and I’m in the airport and I didn’t get kidnapped and I’m running
through security and the large woman who looks like she’s having a bad day
waves me to the front of the line and I’m trying not to yell at the tram to go
faster, don’t they know my plane leaves in ten minutes, and then I’m running up
the escalator trying to be polite to the people on the left side, but don’t
they know my flight is about to leave, and then I see the gate and I join the
back of the line and walk on like nothing ever happened, trying to slow down my
breath so I’m not so obvious and thanking God until I’m in my seat.
This is great and replicates the breathlessness of the experience so well! Two thoughts -- you could do better than "woman who looks like she's having a bad day" for an image if you give us the detail about appearance that suggests she's having a bad day. Then, see if you can push for insight . . . what makes this story important for readers -- remember the shift @ the end of Lee's poem.
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